breakout

[ostavil]

( Bucky actually hasn't had his own mind in decades and now he does. It's a secret - a huge one - but he can think for himself. The words aren't gone so if anyone knows he's not just a blank slate waiting to be commanded, he'd be completely wiped and put on ice again, but if he's careful no one will notice. He's quiet and taciturn as the soldier and he's quiet and taciturn as Bucky.

He owes it to an unlikely source. It's Loki, of all people, and from what he understands, Loki had just tried to take over the entire world and then gone in with HYDRA to see if he could still get control and cause mayhem that way. In spite of all that, Loki had chosen to bring him along when he left and Bucky still isn't really sure why. Loki hasn't made that explicitly clear. Bucky's not naïve enough to think a mischief god has done this out of the goodwill of his own heart but it's a better option than staying where he's used and abused so going with him is no question. Where they're going is a bigger problem. )

You know that they know how to track me, right? Did you think this through?

( His whole life has been nothing but rigid commands and structure between the Army and being the Soldier and he doesn't know what to do with someone who simply broke him out of the hell he's been living in without informing him of what the plan is. Bucky knows how to hide and stay off the radar because his work as the Winter Soldier had been more or less covert but he also knows that HYDRA had provided for him in those instances and given the directions as part of his orders. They'd find him very quickly if he went to any of those safe houses. He knows how to survive on the street, too, but Loki doesn't carry himself like someone who is used to being on the street or wants to be on the street. He carries himself like, well, a god, and he's going to be noticed. )

Is there a plan?

Comments

[dothelokimotion]

[ these are such bizarre questions to ask. what worth could they possibly have in the long run of things? ]

I can sing, yes. A strange thing to admire.

[ostavil]

Is it? They don't value musicians on Asgard? Music is one of the things I've missed the most since they...had me.

( Bucky thinks it's strange that Loki doesn't think it's admirable and maybe it's just a culture difference? He can't imagine a place that doesn't think being a good musician isn't admirable. )

If I could sing or play something, I could make my own music, but I can't so I have to depend on other people.

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki pause as if to digest his thoughts. ]

Asgard is a warrior culture. They care for song, but only in the service of that. But there was appreciation.

[ it just . . . wasn't for loki. it was never for loki. ]

Why are you asking these things?

[ostavil]

You're the first person I've had the chance to talk to and get to know in decades. Why wouldn't I ask them? Getting to know people is a natural enough thing.

( Loki seems taken aback by what Bucky thinks is normal get to know you things and Bucky wonders if the world has changed. He frowns a bit, thoughtful. )

Do you not want me to ask?

[dothelokimotion]

No. It's just . . . not what I expected to be asked.

[ what kind of secrets could be gleaned by such a thing? bizarre. this is an assassin. loki is a — well, he's not entirely sure what he is anymore, but certainly nothing good. ]

[ostavil]

Well, maybe I'm just not what you expected. The longer I'm out from under the programming, the more me I feel. It's still in there, unfortunately, but at least nobody's around to lock me down with the words.

( Bucky has the sense that Loki is one of the few people who could handle him when he's the Winter Soldier. )

So I guess I'm a little...chattier.

[dothelokimotion]

[ that hadn't taken long. a part of loki itches to take a deeper look, but no. it wasn't wise to jeopardize their burgeoning partnership early on. ]

So it seems. I'm not really the sharing type.

[ostavil]

Well I'm just saying you could, if you wanted. I'm not going to tell anyone. I've always been that way about secrets. The way I see it, if someone trusts you with that, you owe it to them to keep it safe.

( He gives Loki a meaningful look. )

So if you ever feel ready to share anything, I'm a safe person to do it with.

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki purses his lips for a moment. ]

I will . . . consider it.

[ostavil]

Well, consider as much as you want. Are you hungry? I don't know about how Asgardians have to eat but I have to eat a ton or my metabolism will eat me alive.

( Bucky grins at him. )

See? Sharing.

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki huffs. ]

I don't require as much sustenance as mortals do.

[ostavil]

Do you like eating? Maybe that's a better question. Or does it make you feel human? Cause we wouldn't want you to feel human.

( Bucky isn't exactly laughing at him but he is generally amused and it's fun to poke a little bit. )

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki rolls his eyes. ]

I'm not some sort of automaton. I eat as much as anyone else.

[ostavil]

Look, I'm just trying to see what you like. If we're gonna spend time together, we might as well try to get along, you know? Like I said, everyone needs a friend. Even you.

( Bucky gives him a smile. )

You're not a bad guy, Loki, even if you played at being one.

[dothelokimotion]

[ dryly. ]

I think I did more than simply "play" at one.

[ostavil]

But you're not a completely bad person. Why rescue me? Not exactly efficient unless you want to use me as the Winter Soldier but you haven't. So I've decided that you're...neutral. You work for yourself.

( Bucky pauses for a moment before saying anything else. )

Looking out for yourself is a good way to make sure others can't hurt you until they do.

[dothelokimotion]

[ he frowns. being disseminated unnerves him every time. has he become so easy to read? ]

Good, bad . . . those binaries give you all clarity. But I'm not interested in them.

[ostavil]

So what do you want to be, then? Something in between on a long spectrum? Because then you're just like me.

( Bucky never thought he'd have something in common with a literal god but here they are. )

[dothelokimotion]

[ first of all, how dare you. ]

Why is it necessary to be something?

[ostavil]

I wanna know who I am because I haven't been able to be anything for decades. I don't know about you. You have a chance to be anyone you want right now. We're off the grid, you know?

( It's a completely blank slate, at least in his eyes, and he wants to take advantage of it. )

You get the chance to decide who and what you're gonna be right now and if that's different than what you were. It's a big thing.

[dothelokimotion]

It is a big thing for you. I find myself less invested in it. I still intend to be Loki and to return to Asgard someday.

[ostavil]

How you planning on getting back there, exactly? Do you think they're just gonna let you walk back in? Or do crimes on Earth not count?

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki waves a flippant hand. ]

I doubt the All-Father cares all that much about what happens on Earth.

But I will find a way.

[ostavil]

I guess the other question is going to be how you intend to actually travel there but you use the Bifrost, don't you? I don't know if that's real or not but what I remember of Norse mythology says that's how you get around.

( If that's how it works, Bucky has a whole lot more follow up questions to that. )

[dothelokimotion]

[ hm. ]

You're well educated for a human. Yes, we use the Bifrost, but I know secret paths across the universe. We'll be using one of those to travel across your planet as well.