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"Well, that's not true. You can go anywhere you wanna go - with or without me. I'm not keeping you in a tower."

If that's what she thinks, Bucky wants to correct that very quickly. Just because he's a celebrity doesn't mean he doesn't have a life and that extends to Natasha as well. She should have a life and friends and do things away from the house as much as she desires to.

"Though right now, I think you need to stay in bed. Dr. Bucky says."

"No, I know," she told him, glancing up briefly. "I know you aren't. I just...it feels like the only place he can't get to me is here." The asshole had permeated her office, souring the quiet zen of the building that she'd worked so hard to establish. "I mean, I did file that restraining order, but I know better than most just how easy it is to get around one. And he's a serving soldier - that grants him a lot of leeway when it comes to local authority."

Natasha sighed again, disconsolate. "I could notify his commanding officer, tell him what a jerk Alex is being, but given that what I know of the man, he's just like the officers under his command, that would probably just amuse him more than anything else. A little civilian can't take a few jokes." She huffed a snort, sounding like an irritated dragon.

"I just want him to go away," she groused, wincing as her stomach protested her upset. Natasha forced herself to settle, nuzzling beneath Bucky's chin and inhaling the clean scent of his skin. "But you're right," she murmured, "...staying in bed is the best idea right now..."

"And since he's a soldier, I can call up the MPs any time I damn well please and if he's doing shit he shouldn't be doing, they can write him up from Cali to New York. Trust me. I was in the Army, I know how that shit works. Guys were one day late on their child support because they were in Afghanistan and the MPs rolled up to throw them in jail. It's not something I'd do for the hell of it but it's something he's got to worry about."

He'd get out of it, sure, but it'd be annoying as fuck in the meantime.

"But bed isn't the place to talk about all that. You go right on back to sleep, all right?"

She hadn't considered that. "Oh," was all she said, speculative for a moment. "I didn't know you could do that."

Still, Bucky was right; it was time to try and go back to sleep. Her nights before this had been restless, as her body was still adjusting to being pregnant, and comfort had been sparse. But now, lying in the arms of her child's father, rest was surprisingly nearby. Her sigh this time was one of release, letting go of her nerves and her tension, trying to drift back into slumber while cradled in strong arms.

"...will you sing for me?" A whispered request, given as her small hands slowly drifted up and down his back, delicate fingertips tracing the lines of corded muscle beneath warm skin.

"Sing? Absolutely," Bucky says, kissing the crown of her head before singing soft and low, choosing one of the ballads off the new album instead of the normal fare. He figures that will be a hell of a lot more relaxing than listening to him belt out something that's supposed to have electric guitar and drums under it anyway.

"I've got you," he murmurs between lines. "Just go to sleep and don't worry about a thing."

Listening to his wonderful voice soothed her all the way down, and it was only a few minutes more before Natasha drifted right off to sleep, her nose pressed tight against Bucky's throat. She apparently needed the uninterrupted sleep, because it was several hours later before she stirred, grumbling lightly at the glare of California sunshine that seemed determined to penetrate her closed eyes.

She was still nice and warm, so it was probable that her bedmate was close by, and Natasha petulantly pulled the thick comforter over her head, burrowing into the pillows.

"...ugh...what time izzit?"

"Eh, 1:30, give or take a few. You needed the sleep," Bucky says, grinning at Natasha. "And I couldn't give up my role as pillow so I just laid here until you decided to wake up. It wasn't a bad few hours, gotta say. We should do it more often."

He kisses the top of her head and tries to meet her eyes. "You want me to make you something to eat? I happen to have many abilities and cooking is among them."

Natasha blinked. One-thirty? Dear God, she'd never slept that late! Not even when she'd been miserable with the stomach flu and had been running a hundred and one fever! But apparently she had needed to sleep today, because her stomach was quiet, nothing hurt and she felt surprisingly rested for the first time in weeks.

Hearing that Bucky had stayed in bed to be her pillow brought a soft flush to pale cheeks, and Natasha came out from under the duvet to give him a shy smile, followed by a gentle kiss to his scruffy cheek. "Thank you," she whispered, pausing to give his nose a brief nuzzle with hers.

"Food actually sounds...wonderful. I believe you promised me eggs and pancakes, Bucky Barnes?"

"I sure did. You stay right where you are and I'll make everything and bring it back up to you," Bucky says. He's happy to get out of bed and go make Natasha pancakes if that's what makes her happy and it makes him happy to see her happy so if it's the tiniest bit selfish, well, he'll be selfish.

It takes a little while to get everything cooked and then it takes him a little while longer to find the trays to bring shit up on but he does and luckily his trays are big enough to hold food enough for two people on them.

"See? I'm full service."

She had to laugh, seeing her intended make his way into the bedroom with a heavily laden service tray, holding enough food to feed at least a regiment. While he'd been downstairs, Natasha had slid out of bed, brushed her teeth and washed her face, and arranged her thick curls into a single braid over her left shoulder before climbing back in bed to doze and wait.

"You certainly are," she agreed, smoothing the comforter so he could set down his heavy burden. The pancakes smelled wonderful, and it lightened her heart to see a small bowl of plump red strawberries next to the syrup. And another steaming mug of tea next to his coffee.

"Thank you, James." Natasha smiled, a true smile this time, her eyes warm as they met his. "This is so sweet of you." Reaching for his hand, she leaned over and tugged him to her for a soft, chaste kiss, gentle as to not disrupt their breakfast. "It looks and smells delicious."

Bucky feels a lot of things when Natasha reaches for his hand - shy, proud, excited. He tries to push them down and focus on making sure she has everything she wants, though, because it's not about him right now. Right now, it's about making it a safe place for her and the baby and she has genuine reason to worry, considering Alex.

"Nah, it wasn't a big deal. Now, if you had me go out and get the elephant it might have been a big deal but this? This was nothing."

Maybe he's spoiling her a little too much but isn't that better than not seeing to her needs? Bucky thinks so. He looks over the tray to try and see if anything's missing. He doesn't think so.

"Anything else I need to go find and put on here? I'm good for it."

Natasha shook her head, already reaching for the mug of hot tea. "No, everything looks good. I can't wait to dive in." And after a few hearty sips of tea, she did so, picking up a plate of pancakes and covering them in syrup. It probably wasn't the wisest thing to do; eat pancakes on these immaculate sheets, but she was careful not to spill a drop.

The sweet, tart strawberries tasted wonderful next to the flavorful pancakes, and Natasha ate heartily, truly hungry for what seemed the first time in weeks. She was on her fourth slice of bacon when she realized how much of a glutton she seemed, and a light flush crept over her cheeks, abashed.

"Mmm, sorry. I was really hungry, apparently. But you're a great chef, so, compliments?"

"Taken," Bucky says, grinning. "We still got food in the fridge down there if you want me to make you some more. Can't let you go hungry in my house, it'd be a fucking tragedy."

Bucky's just glad she's eating because he knows his sisters had a lot of trouble with it at first because of the morning sickness.

"Anything you want, you get. I mean it. Go look through the fridge down there and if there's anything missing, you write it down and it goes in the grocery order."

"I'll make a grocery list," Natasha promised, taking another sip of still-hot tea. "I don't really know how to cook much, but I do like fresh fruit and salads. And I'll put anything in a salad. Almonds, tuna, pineapples, grapes, you name it."

She supposed since she was now living here permanently, she might as well settle in, even if the house did still feel to her like a very lavish hotel. And it really didn't make much sense to be staying in one of the spare bedrooms, either, considering upcoming events. Natasha supposed she was going to have to put a brave face on, and come to terms with this new life.

"Milk," she murmured, an afterthought. "I always try to drink a large glass of milk before bed." She plucked at the bedspread, a little abashed. "...seems to help me sleep, sometimes."

"Yeah sure, we can get all that stuff. You can have whatever you want," Bucky assures her. "I know you're not used to asking or used to having but you don't have to worry about that with me, okay? You ask for whatever you want and if I can get it, I'll get it."

Bucky wants to make it clear he's nothing like Alex and he knows there's a lot of ways he has to do that. It isn't just about sex or affection - it's little things like thinking of her when getting the groceries or asking her opinion on the color of the bedroom. Choices. She should get choices.

"I gotta get you put on the bank account and stuff but that can wait a little bit. I'll just give you my card if you need something."

No, Bucky Barnes was nothing at all like Alex Shostakov. A fact she was coming to believe more and more. Alex would have thrown a fit if she'd told him she was pregnant, and immediately turned around with seven ideas of how to get rid of it. He'd made it perfectly clear during their first year together that he never wanted children, and had cautioned Natasha to stay on the birth control, even if doing so sometimes made her feel horrible.

Bucky had been nothing but excited, nearly shouting his happiness from the rooftops, that he was going to be a father, and about time, too. (That had come from his grinning father, more than delighted to have another grandchild to spoil.) And Bucky had also been adamant to take care of her, and even marry her, surprisingly. Everything any woman could ever dream of.

A husband. A home. A family.

That thought floating across the front of her mind, Natasha quite abruptly put down her empty plate, then shifted about enough that she could scoot across the bed and right into her fiancé's lap. A finger pressed to his lips - to keep him from talking - and she shook her head slightly, saying in a low whisper, "...don't say anything. Just let me..." Her lashes lowered; she rested her forehead to his.

"...thank you, James. For taking care of me. --don't talk," she reiterated, keeping her finger pressed to his lips. "Just...accept it. Please." He tended to babble at every corner, she'd learned.

And rather than remove her fingers for him to do just that, Natasha instead lowered her hand only to replace it with her lips, pressed light and sweet against his.

It says something about their relationship that Natasha has to actively tell him not to talk but Bucky can't really roll that over in his mind too much before she's kissing him and that surprises him more than anything. She's made it very clear that she's not ready to be a true couple yet, that she's just finding her feet after a rough several years, and the kiss is something welcomed even if it's blowing him away that it's happening.

He lets Natasha control it for a moment before he works his hands in all that glorious red hair of hers and deepens it, really trying to show how much he loves her and cares about her and needs her in this kiss. Maybe his words are shitty but he hopes this can at least demonstrate what he's terrible at talking about.

She didn't pull away when Bucky slid his hands into her hair and pulled her closer, deepening their kiss enough to make her moan, very softly. It was just as wonderful as the last kisses had been; his mouth was sweet, tongue bold and sure, and lips so, so soft. Natasha wanted to weep, and wasn't too surprised to feel tears soak her lashes.

Cupping his face in both hands, she rose slightly on her knees, ivory silk whispering upwards along her thighs, but clothing didn't really matter at the moment. Kissing Bucky Barnes was far more important, even if doing so was the most unfair thing she could ever, ever do.

One kiss became two, two became four, and finally Natasha was completely out of breath, panting softly as her arms slowly slid around his neck and she leaned in enough to rest her cheek against his, trembling as she stifled her quiet sobs, hid from him her tears.

Bucky thinks these kisses are probably the best ones he's ever had in his life and he's a little surprised when Natasha breaks away to wrap her arms around him. It's all right to take a break, though, and he rubs his hand at the back of her neck before he realizes she's trembling.

"Natasha? Is everything okay?"

It was a shaky breath she inhaled, and exhaled a moment later on a quiet, "...yeah." It wasn't okay, but she also knew that most of it was her hormones; her doctor had warned her that her mood swings might go up and down, but Natasha hadn't expected this sort of roller coaster.

Still, she covertly wiped her eyes, fixed a small, shaky smile on her lips, and lifted her head, meeting Bucky's wide, worried gaze without much hesitation. "...I'm okay," she promised, unable to keep from sniffling softly. "Just...a lot's going on, you know?"

She made no move out of his lap, and her small fingers couldn't help but surreptitiously tangle in the ends of his shaggy hair, a comfort of which even she wasn't aware.

"Well, I can understand that," Bucky says softly. "You want me to get these dishes out of here so I can get back in bed with you? I'm just going to go put them on the table over there, I'm not leaving, but it's a little hard to cuddle when you've got plates everywhere."

He grins at her. "We could break the dishes though. If you're into that. I'm a blank slate, baby. I've never done that in bed before but I'm up to trying it."

Edited 2022-03-01 04:14 (UTC)

Natasha blinked at him for a moment, then snorted a quiet little giggle. "Um...I think putting them aside will work, really." To that effect, she slipped out of his lap, back to her side of the large bed, cuddling a plushy pillow as she settled. A bit of heat flooded her cheeks, realizing what he'd meant, but she realized that it was just silly teasing, nothing more.

Something her fiancé did on a regular basis, she was learning.

Nevertheless, Natasha watched idly as Bucky swept the now-empty breakfast tray off of the bedspread, indeed placing it nearby on the vanity. "It'd be really lazy to stay in bed all day," she observed. "I don't think I've ever done it, really." Not the workaholic that she was.

"Then we're gonna stay in bed all day," Bucky says emphatically. "Because I think everyone should do that at least once in their lives and y'know, I'm here to entertain you. Maybe we can get up to something good."

Bucky doesn't expect anything to happen, not really, but he does want to spend the time with Natasha and have it be stress free and just nice. He wants these moments with her. He slides back into bed and offers his arms to her.

"C'mere. You look cold."

A little surprised that Bucky actually wanted to stay in bed all day, and with her, Natasha blinked again, but obliged when he slipped beneath the bolster and held out an arm. She slid over again, winding her own arms around his waist as she cuddled into his embrace.

"A little," she admitted, stifling a shiver. Her stomach gave a gurgle, Natasha blushed, then giggled. "Your son apparently likes pancakes," she quipped, nestling down into the pillows and Bucky's arms. "That's a good sign, I think."

"Kid's got taste for my favorite food, I like him already," Bucky says, keeping Natasha close. He likes this, honestly, and he hopes they get to do it more often. He hopes she feels safe enough with him to do it.

"I wanna feel him. I can't wait until I can do that," Bucky admits. "I'm so excited. I kind of blurted it out to everyone as soon as I could and I probably shouldn't have but I wanted this baby so much I couldn't help myself."

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