Still shivering, Natalia instinctively wrapped her feeble arms around the arm that materialized around her waist, clutching as tight as she possibly could. There was a heavy warmth now at her back, and she burrowed backwards into it, soothed by that achingly familiar scent. The voice, too, was familiar, like a dream she could see but not yet reach.
It hit her half an hour later, when she suddenly gasped a quick breath and blinked her eyes open, seeing not bare steel walls, but faded wallpaper and a closed wooden door. "...Nikolai...?" Yes, had to be. No one else in all the world carried that distinctive scent; pine, snow, cinnamon.
Tears began to fill her eyes, and she sniffled back a choked sob. But tightened her grip on his arm, snug around her, holding her close. "...moya zvezda...Nikki..." Relief so great washed through her, leaving her limp once again. He had come for her. She was finally safe.
"Thank God, I thought I lost you," Nikolai says, holding her as tight as he dares. He doesn't want to hurt her but hearing her say his name and seem lucid makes him happier than anything has ever made him. She's going to make it. She's alive. He kisses the crown of her head and just holds her close for warmth.
"We're in Austria, printsessa, but I have you now. You're safe with me and no one can hurt you. As soon as I'm sure we're safe to be in the open, I'll let you speak to your father and we'll go home, all right? I just need to keep you with me right now until I'm sure we're safe."
Natalia clutched him back in turn, silently sobbing in relief this time, not fear. She was safe. Although her body hurt, and she knew she needed medical attention - she had no idea what they'd done to her while she'd been unconscious - the little princess didn't want to move from this very spot for a thousand and thousand years.
She also knew her parents had to be frantic, but she was with her Nikolai now; it was all over but for the reporting. And apparently he didn't think it was safe to travel just yet, else she knew they'd be heading north. Back home. Back to Russia. Natalia didn't think she'd ever missed St. Petersburg this much in her entire life.
"...I love you," she whispered against the back of his hand, caught up close to her pale cheek. Heavy lashes lowered again over tired eyes. "...I'm so glad that you came for me. Moya zvedza..."
"When have I not come for you, sweet printsessa? Rest for a little while. I'll get you to a doctor when it's safer and then we'll go back to St. Petersburg. You'll be safe and at home again, all right? Nothing to fear."
Nikolai holds her close to keep her warm and to keep her from going into shock and he whispers against her hair. "Rest for me, all right? I'll be taking you home soon and then I won't let you go. You know that. I'll never let you go."
"Da," she whispered, feeling lethargy pull at her yet again, "I want to go home." To the land of her birth, to familiar halls and familiar faces. A safe place, with safe people around her. But the little princess absolutely knew, she knew, that as long as Nikolai held her, she'd never be in danger again. They'd been blindsided once; never more.
"Tomorrow?" It was a small query, almost unheard in the deafening silence. "No matter what, tomorrow, Nikki?"
"Tomorrow. We'll have a doctor on the plane. I just have to make sure you're safe to bring out, all right? That's all. I won't let you be away from me for a moment, though, and nothing is going to happen to you. You're with me no matter what."
Nikolai wants to hug her fiercely but she's so fragile that he doesn't dare to do it. Instead, he kisses along soft skin and tries to reassure her that nothing is going to happen to her. What if it's a lie, though? They'd gotten through this time. He'd failed her. What if he failed her again?
"I won't let anyone into your room. It'll be just me when we get back, just us. You'll be safe."
Curled in the arms of her beloved, Natalia eventually slept. Her sleep was thankfully dreamless, and true, and it was both the gentle knocking on the closed, and barricaded, door and Nikolai's immediate stiffening at her back that woke her. A bolt of instinctive fear ran cold over her and she shied back beneath the layers of blankets, as their room was cool even in early summer.
An aged female voice called out in quavery German; it was the innkeep's housewoman bringing breakfast. The princess could smell delicious gravy and rich yeasty bread even from inside their room, and she didn't protest when she felt Nikolai shift enough to slip out of the bed to verify it.
"...if it is breakfast," she said quietly, hugging his pillow tight to her chest, "I could eat some. I'm absolutely starving."
"It's breakfast. I have to get it and test it first," Nikolai says, pulling on his clothes. No one knows who he is here or that Natalia is here but he doesn't trust anyone. He can't let his guard down for a moment because even if he is the Winter Soldier, they'd neutralized him.
He brings in two trays with fresh bread, gravy, preserves, ham, fruit - a real spread for just a hostel - and sets them out on the small table in their room.
"Tell me what you want and I'll get it for you. There's juice, too, and you need plenty of that."
Natalia gingerly sat up, grimacing as all of her muscles protested, but she managed to scoot up against the head of the old bed and burrow back underneath the covers. "The juice, definitely," she agreed, sniffing eagerly. Her stomach growled in response, but then rolled, reminding her she'd been nearly starved for almost a fortnight.
"...maybe some of the fruit, too? But the bread smells wonderful, maybe I can have a few bites of it, too." She longed to simply dive in and eat her fill, but the princess knew doing so wasn't the wisest course; she'd probably heave it right back up. Disgusting thought, that one.
"Yes, the fruit," Nikolai agrees. "I want you to eat as much as you can because you need it to get healthy but don't do it too quickly. It...can be hard when you haven't had any in a while. I unfortunately know from experience."
He hates that his printsessa has had to learn this but he will help get her back into the real world and help put the nightmares of this firmly in the past. It's part of his mission now, just as much as it's his mission to keep her physically safe.
"But you need the nutrients to get healthy again. We'll be flying home today. I'm contacting the FSB now."
Natalia picked at the tidbits Nikolai brought for her, half-listening as he pulled out his cell and made contact with their external security. The juice tasted heavenly, and she drank it all without hesitation, then nibbled on a bit of the still-warm bread. She also managed a few slices of peach, and two sweet strawberries before curling back beneath the warm covers to rest while she waited for her guardian to rejoin her.
She really wanted a good hot bath, with jasmine oil and soothing cream, but surely that would have to wait until she made it home, and after her medical examination. Maybe they would pronounce her cleared and she could take a sponge bath on the plane. She felt grimy, yucky, and emotionally dirty; everything was just completely out of form.
"I know you're tired but you did a good job eating. The food will make you feel better," Nikolai encourages her. "Do you need to warm up for a little while longer? Take another nap? I can lay down with you for a while. We're doing this at your pace."
He doesn't want to overtax her trying to get her on a plane and out of the country and end up setting back her progress. He has no idea what all she might have been pumped full of while in the "tender" care of HYDRA so he wants to take every precaution.
Oh, but she was more than ready to go home. The longer she tarried, the closer she could feel "them" creeping back up again, and the little princess really wanted to get across the borders of her homeland, where she thought the ghosts might not be able to find her again.
"I'm ready," Natalia assured her protector, sliding out from beneath the covers and taking a moment before easing out of bed, still a little unsure of her footing. "'m ready to go home, Nikolai." It was also a soft, plaintive plea, and she gingerly hunted around for the rest of her hastily procured clothing, pulling on the sweater with a mild grimace of effort.
Nikolai puts in calls to Petrov and the others and they arrange for a jet to be at a private airstrip not far from where they're currently staying. All Nikolai has to drive is a rented motorcycle and he doubts the printsessa is going to ride on that.
"We have to get you a car unless you think you can hold onto me on the back of a motorcycle. It's just a short drive to the airstrip, I promise."
She was still a little dubious about riding in cars. A motorcycle wasn't that much better, but at least they could see any potential threats. As for holding on behind him, hmm...
"...could I sit in front of you?" Natalia clutched his too-big sweater at her neck. It was a lovely, sunny day, but she still felt shadows everywhere. "I won't fall off if you're holding me on in the front, Nikki."
She'd ridden with him before, when she'd been small, so the princess knew how to ride one of the big beasts, and necessity ruled in this particular situation.
"Yes, I'll hold you in front so you'll be secure," Nikolai agrees. "Come on. The sooner we get to the jet, the sooner we get you home and into your own warm bed."
The unspoken half of that sentence is that he'll be in that bed too, warming it up, because he's not leaving her side until he's reasonably sure she's feeling better.
"We'd better get a move on, though, if you're ready."
Oh, but she could hardly wait. To that endeavor, Natalia gingerly climbed astride in front of her beloved, unhesitatingly relaxing back into his chest and clinging tight to the arm he curved around her waist. There was little need to bother with a helmet; she knew Nikolai would never let her fall.
It was indeed a very short trip to the airport, where a jet was already fueled and waiting. The little princess felt yet another level of worry leave her when she spied the familiar faces of her father's very own private security, the Chief Officer touching his forehead when Nikolai carried her past, unerringly heading for the boarding ramp.
"Officer Petrov," she murmured to his gesture, then returned her head to Nikolai's broad shoulder and closed her eyes, letting him take her on board and the rest could just follow along, as far as she was concerned.
"Did you have to bring her on that beast instead of in a car where she'd be protected?"
Nikolai grunts a little under his breath. "Petrov, she was snatched from a car to begin with and I was in the car at the time. Now's not the time to decide what's safe and what isn't. The printsessa is back with us and needs a doctor to check her over. The doctor is on board, yes?"
Petrov confirms the doctor is and she comes to meet Natalia on the ramp in order to usher her inside. Nikolai lights up as he walks up and Petrov rolls his eyes. "You shouldn't inside the cabin." Nikolai shrugs. "Stressful day. I need my habits."
The chatter behind her slid right off as the doctor approached. "Princess," she greeted the girl cordially, holding out an arm to help Natalia further into the plane. "Let's get you settled and all of this unpleasantness out of the way, da?" Steeling herself, the princess nodded politely, smile not quite reaching her eyes, and disappeared into the cabin with the physician.
They'd reached cruising speed before the doctor emerged from the private cabin, giving a heavy sigh and straightening her white coat. She put her hands in her pockets as she approached the two security officers, unabashedly taking a cigarette from Nikolai's pack and lighting up with her own lighter before speaking.
"Well. Gentlemen. You will be pleased to know that other than exhaustion, dehydration, and malnutrition, there seems to be nothing else amiss with Her Imperial Highness." Forthright and business-like, she continued right on. "A few contusions, one or two strained muscles, and, thank God, no sign of rape or sexual abuse. She complains of being overly tired, which is expected, and to still have a very bad headache, but there's no sign of a concussion."
She stubbed out the smoke and added, "I'll know more once we land, and I can do a full, more thorough examination, but for the moment, all she really needs is to rest."
It's a relief to hear that she is not more injured than a few bumps and bruises and when the doctor says that Natalia merely needs to rest, Nikolai feels a great deal more confident. There's no way she'll rest without him nearby so he gets a blanket and goes to her, lifting the armrest in the seat so that she can sprawl across it and into his lap.
"Come, sleep here while we fly home. It will be a little while but I will keep you company. Nothing will bother you while I am here, just as always."
He had failed that promise recently but he will not fail it again.
She still felt a little...violated, considering some of the things the doctor had asked her, but Natalia didn't hesitate to lift her arms to her beloved when he appeared, more than willing to be pulled into his embrace and snuggle close.
"...Nikolai..." she purred happily, burrowing her nose into the curve of his neck as they settled together. Petrov could just wait; she needed the former Winter Soldier right now.
Cuddled beneath the blanket, Natalia felt Nikolai's warmth slowly seeping into her bones, and she stirred only slightly when she asked, "...she said...she said I was okay, da?"
"She said you were just fine," Nikolai says, pulling her into his arms and holding her tight enough that he feels secure with her. Losing her had made him feel adrift until she was back and this embrace is as much for him as it is for her; she's his touchstone.
"We are going to rest on the flight and then when you get back to the Winter Palace, it is bed and tea for you and I will debrief Petrov. You will not have to speak with him. I think it would be too much on you to talk about it just now and you should not have to do it."
Natalia was quiet for a moment, then she shifted enough to gaze up at him, eyes weary but determined. "I can do it, Nikki," she told her possessive guardian. "And I need to. I still remember...everything that happened there, and Officer Petrov needs to know." A small warm hand gently stroked his cheek, and a corner of her mouth lifted in a smile. "I'm not such a fragile flower anymore, moya zvezda, I'll be all right."
Rather than hear him protest, the princess instead coaxed him to her for a soft, sweet kiss, lips lingering as they snuggled together. This section of the jet was partisaned away from the rest, and no one would dare enter without express permission. And, God, but she'd missed the taste of his kisses, and the gentle strokes of his hands.
No, no one was going to come back here but Nikolai still keeps the kiss brief. She needs her rest, he thinks, and the last thing he wants is to be caught off-guard again when she's in his care. She'd been taken this last time and recovered but what if they weren't so lucky the next time?
No, there couldn't be a next time.
"Keep close for a little while, then. I don't want you out of my sight for right now and you need to sleep."
Natalia definitely wasn't going to argue, not this time. She was asleep in less than ten minutes, secure and warm in Nikolai's arms. The flight to St. Petersburg wasn't overly long, and the princess slept until she had to buckle her own seat belt to land, and Petrov then reported to Nikolai that the Tsar had sent a private helicopter to transport them to the Winter Palace; no automobiles required.
That news made the Grand Duchess breathe a little easier, and she forced a small smile when everyone began to gather their things after landing. No doubt there would be cameras on the landing strip, but she wasn't too worried; she'd be well ensconced behind several large burly men, and her own personal bulwark would be right beside her, at that.
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It hit her half an hour later, when she suddenly gasped a quick breath and blinked her eyes open, seeing not bare steel walls, but faded wallpaper and a closed wooden door. "...Nikolai...?" Yes, had to be. No one else in all the world carried that distinctive scent; pine, snow, cinnamon.
Tears began to fill her eyes, and she sniffled back a choked sob. But tightened her grip on his arm, snug around her, holding her close. "...moya zvezda...Nikki..." Relief so great washed through her, leaving her limp once again. He had come for her. She was finally safe.
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"We're in Austria, printsessa, but I have you now. You're safe with me and no one can hurt you. As soon as I'm sure we're safe to be in the open, I'll let you speak to your father and we'll go home, all right? I just need to keep you with me right now until I'm sure we're safe."
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She also knew her parents had to be frantic, but she was with her Nikolai now; it was all over but for the reporting. And apparently he didn't think it was safe to travel just yet, else she knew they'd be heading north. Back home. Back to Russia. Natalia didn't think she'd ever missed St. Petersburg this much in her entire life.
"...I love you," she whispered against the back of his hand, caught up close to her pale cheek. Heavy lashes lowered again over tired eyes. "...I'm so glad that you came for me. Moya zvedza..."
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Nikolai holds her close to keep her warm and to keep her from going into shock and he whispers against her hair. "Rest for me, all right? I'll be taking you home soon and then I won't let you go. You know that. I'll never let you go."
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"Tomorrow?" It was a small query, almost unheard in the deafening silence. "No matter what, tomorrow, Nikki?"
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Nikolai wants to hug her fiercely but she's so fragile that he doesn't dare to do it. Instead, he kisses along soft skin and tries to reassure her that nothing is going to happen to her. What if it's a lie, though? They'd gotten through this time. He'd failed her. What if he failed her again?
"I won't let anyone into your room. It'll be just me when we get back, just us. You'll be safe."
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An aged female voice called out in quavery German; it was the innkeep's housewoman bringing breakfast. The princess could smell delicious gravy and rich yeasty bread even from inside their room, and she didn't protest when she felt Nikolai shift enough to slip out of the bed to verify it.
"...if it is breakfast," she said quietly, hugging his pillow tight to her chest, "I could eat some. I'm absolutely starving."
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He brings in two trays with fresh bread, gravy, preserves, ham, fruit - a real spread for just a hostel - and sets them out on the small table in their room.
"Tell me what you want and I'll get it for you. There's juice, too, and you need plenty of that."
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"...maybe some of the fruit, too? But the bread smells wonderful, maybe I can have a few bites of it, too." She longed to simply dive in and eat her fill, but the princess knew doing so wasn't the wisest course; she'd probably heave it right back up. Disgusting thought, that one.
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He hates that his printsessa has had to learn this but he will help get her back into the real world and help put the nightmares of this firmly in the past. It's part of his mission now, just as much as it's his mission to keep her physically safe.
"But you need the nutrients to get healthy again. We'll be flying home today. I'm contacting the FSB now."
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She really wanted a good hot bath, with jasmine oil and soothing cream, but surely that would have to wait until she made it home, and after her medical examination. Maybe they would pronounce her cleared and she could take a sponge bath on the plane. She felt grimy, yucky, and emotionally dirty; everything was just completely out of form.
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He doesn't want to overtax her trying to get her on a plane and out of the country and end up setting back her progress. He has no idea what all she might have been pumped full of while in the "tender" care of HYDRA so he wants to take every precaution.
"We can take a little time, I promise."
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"I'm ready," Natalia assured her protector, sliding out from beneath the covers and taking a moment before easing out of bed, still a little unsure of her footing. "'m ready to go home, Nikolai." It was also a soft, plaintive plea, and she gingerly hunted around for the rest of her hastily procured clothing, pulling on the sweater with a mild grimace of effort.
"...can we? Please?"
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Nikolai puts in calls to Petrov and the others and they arrange for a jet to be at a private airstrip not far from where they're currently staying. All Nikolai has to drive is a rented motorcycle and he doubts the printsessa is going to ride on that.
"We have to get you a car unless you think you can hold onto me on the back of a motorcycle. It's just a short drive to the airstrip, I promise."
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"...could I sit in front of you?" Natalia clutched his too-big sweater at her neck. It was a lovely, sunny day, but she still felt shadows everywhere. "I won't fall off if you're holding me on in the front, Nikki."
She'd ridden with him before, when she'd been small, so the princess knew how to ride one of the big beasts, and necessity ruled in this particular situation.
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The unspoken half of that sentence is that he'll be in that bed too, warming it up, because he's not leaving her side until he's reasonably sure she's feeling better.
"We'd better get a move on, though, if you're ready."
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It was indeed a very short trip to the airport, where a jet was already fueled and waiting. The little princess felt yet another level of worry leave her when she spied the familiar faces of her father's very own private security, the Chief Officer touching his forehead when Nikolai carried her past, unerringly heading for the boarding ramp.
"Officer Petrov," she murmured to his gesture, then returned her head to Nikolai's broad shoulder and closed her eyes, letting him take her on board and the rest could just follow along, as far as she was concerned.
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Nikolai grunts a little under his breath. "Petrov, she was snatched from a car to begin with and I was in the car at the time. Now's not the time to decide what's safe and what isn't. The printsessa is back with us and needs a doctor to check her over. The doctor is on board, yes?"
Petrov confirms the doctor is and she comes to meet Natalia on the ramp in order to usher her inside. Nikolai lights up as he walks up and Petrov rolls his eyes. "You shouldn't inside the cabin." Nikolai shrugs. "Stressful day. I need my habits."
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They'd reached cruising speed before the doctor emerged from the private cabin, giving a heavy sigh and straightening her white coat. She put her hands in her pockets as she approached the two security officers, unabashedly taking a cigarette from Nikolai's pack and lighting up with her own lighter before speaking.
"Well. Gentlemen. You will be pleased to know that other than exhaustion, dehydration, and malnutrition, there seems to be nothing else amiss with Her Imperial Highness." Forthright and business-like, she continued right on. "A few contusions, one or two strained muscles, and, thank God, no sign of rape or sexual abuse. She complains of being overly tired, which is expected, and to still have a very bad headache, but there's no sign of a concussion."
She stubbed out the smoke and added, "I'll know more once we land, and I can do a full, more thorough examination, but for the moment, all she really needs is to rest."
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"Come, sleep here while we fly home. It will be a little while but I will keep you company. Nothing will bother you while I am here, just as always."
He had failed that promise recently but he will not fail it again.
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"...Nikolai..." she purred happily, burrowing her nose into the curve of his neck as they settled together. Petrov could just wait; she needed the former Winter Soldier right now.
Cuddled beneath the blanket, Natalia felt Nikolai's warmth slowly seeping into her bones, and she stirred only slightly when she asked, "...she said...she said I was okay, da?"
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"We are going to rest on the flight and then when you get back to the Winter Palace, it is bed and tea for you and I will debrief Petrov. You will not have to speak with him. I think it would be too much on you to talk about it just now and you should not have to do it."
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Rather than hear him protest, the princess instead coaxed him to her for a soft, sweet kiss, lips lingering as they snuggled together. This section of the jet was partisaned away from the rest, and no one would dare enter without express permission. And, God, but she'd missed the taste of his kisses, and the gentle strokes of his hands.
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No, there couldn't be a next time.
"Keep close for a little while, then. I don't want you out of my sight for right now and you need to sleep."
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That news made the Grand Duchess breathe a little easier, and she forced a small smile when everyone began to gather their things after landing. No doubt there would be cameras on the landing strip, but she wasn't too worried; she'd be well ensconced behind several large burly men, and her own personal bulwark would be right beside her, at that.
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